2005Apr | May


My nephew Tyrone needs a nice girl
# May 9, 2005 | by wanda
My nephew Tyrone is a good kid. He's 23 years old and owns his own nail salon, and ladies, he's a sharp dresser too. He's just so caught up with his business and his friends, he needs a nice, respectable girlfriend. In fact everytime i see him i tell him that. Like at Easter dinner this year, where i cooked the whole ham all by myself because Shelia (my sister, Tyrone's mom) said she was too "busy" and couldn't be off work until 6. well, i said, "Tyrone, you need a nice, respectable girlfriend" and he laughed and said, "Aunt Wanda, you crack me up." He shouldn't laugh though, because there ain't nothing like a good woman to give a man direction in life. I think the Pope should find Tyrone a girlfriend, unless he's to "busy" like Shelia was on Easter. Which he ain't.


People Should Ask God to Clean Up Our Gay Crime-Ridden Streets
# May 8, 2005 | by Karl-Joseph
Or, perhaps more specifically, we should ask the Rat. He must've learned SOMETHING during his days of military training about keeping order present and gays away. The state of things in my city is disgusting, what with the murder, rape, drugs, and gays. Our so-called "Pope" has already pointed out that homosexuality is evil; I think it's high time he made good on that. There's evil to be eradicated, Joey! We need a Homo-caust and we need it now!


Pope should ask God to fix up our community center
# May 2, 2005 | by wanda
I was driving home from the super market yesterday, i had just bought the supplies to make my world famous chicken gumbo soup, and i noticed that our community center looks like a dump. The paint and plaster are chipping off of the walls, and a bunch of letters in the sign are missing! i don't mean to complain, but i think the Pope really oughta take a few minutes out of his "busy" day and ask God to clean up our center. He could fire that drunk who runs the place, and a new paint job and sign would certainly spruce up the neighborhood, i think its the least he could do.


Why isn't pope a relativist
# May 2, 2005 | by horatio
I am a cultural and moral relativist and, as scientific research shows, so is 94% of the world. Perhaps this is due to my Hispanic and homosexual nature however this can't possibly explain the other 93% of the world.

I digress; my point is I fully expected this ‘so called’ newly elected pope to share my relativist view. This does not seem an irrational desire, EVERY POPE IN HISTORY HAS BEEN A RELATIVIST. This all changed with the election of the indisputably worst pope in the history of the Catholic Church. RATzinger’s incorrect view of relativism can be stated as being this. No great, inspiring culture of the future can be built upon the moral principle of relativism. For at its bottom such a culture holds that nothing is better than anything else, and that all things are in themselves equally meaningless. Except for the fragments of faith (in progress, in compassion, in conscience, in hope) to which it still clings, illegitimately, such a culture teaches every one of its children that life is a tale told by an idiot, signifying nothing. This is stupid and I hate him.


Journalists are starting to catch on
# May 1, 2005 | by eric
Here's an article by Mark Cripps that really sums up a lot of important points.
I understand Joseph Ratzinger, now referred to as Pope Benedict XVI, claims he was not a willing member of the Nazi regime, but he was a participant nonetheless.

As a Catholic, I am extremely disappointed that the 115 Cardinals who entered the Sistine Chapel this week did not have enough foresight to anticipate the public relations nightmare of having a former Nazi soldier as leader of one of the largest religions in the world.

You tell them Mark! It doesn't matter that the Nazis made it compulsory to join, a real pope-to-be would have had God make the Nazis go away. Or disappear or something. The power of prayer can be much more powerful than people think. At any rate, this got me to thinking: how could have the College of Cardinals avoided this mess altogether? Simple, they shouldn't have given into the backhanded wheeling and dealing and back-room power deals I can only assume took place.

THAT MAKES ME SICK.